So, yesterday was Valentine's day huh? I tried to pretend that it wasn't. Not because I'm bitter about being single or anything like that, but I just didn't particularly want the whole loved-up world reminding me of just how hard my resolve to kiss dating goodbye was. Having said that, I did get the sweetest Valentine's email from my dad which made the whole day simply amazing (can you tell I'm such a daddy's girl?)
I am aware that a lot of you probably still have your eyebrows raised at the 'kiss dating goodbye' statement. It's the title of a book I'm currently reading, as well as a principle I'm trying to imbibe. Joshua Harris talks about saving yourself (physically and emotionally) for your future spouse, and not giving away too much in a string of (essentially) meaningless relationships. The author makes a case for enjoying your single days, as opposed to despising them, and how important it is for you to grow as an individual before then trying to merge/combine your life with someone else's. You are probably more likely to run into trouble if you have two 'incomplete' people trying to use the other to complete themselves, than if you had two 'whole' people who simply strengthened each other. It makes the relationship more equal, and less needy and crippling. It also makes for much better relationship mathematics.
Now, while it may not be easy I am also sure that it will definitely be very rewarding if I can stay strong in my resolve.
I came across some quotes on love and marriage while doing research for a recent article I wrote for Amplify The Word;
One was by Jon Bon Jovi, and he said that as for his secret to staying married: "My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she is coming with me."
A second one I read was by Robert Brault which I must share with two friends of mine with 'man troubles';
Sometimes two people need to step apart
and make a space between
that each might see the other anew,
in a glance across a room
or silhouetted against the moon.
and make a space between
that each might see the other anew,
in a glance across a room
or silhouetted against the moon.
From a post titled "For better or worse, or Parkinson's disease" by Bob Kuhn |
Some food for thought eh?
As we celebrate love, either that which is firmly in our grasps, or love hoped for, we must remember that love is a two-way street - we must give as much as we hope to receive - and that there is One who is Love, by His very nature, who has, and always will, love us.
You can also read my article for ATW on the website; especially for some of that relationship mathematics I was talking about...
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